Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(212): View more from New York

I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.

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(765): View more from Indiana

looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...

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(310): View more from California

she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex

(1-310): View more from California

wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh

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(515): View more from Iowa

you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?

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(732): View more from New Jersey

thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.

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(219): View more from Indiana

Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.

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(703): View more from Virginia

Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?

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(314): View more from Missouri

Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.

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