You made me cry and you don't even care
I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
