he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Pants are for mortals
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize
