ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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