I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
