If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
You smell like a Billy Joel song
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
