I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
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