that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
