I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
