Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(716): View more from New York

a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz

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(443): View more from Maryland

He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.

(315): View more from New York

You would pick up a guy in AA.

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(513): View more from Ohio

She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.

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(760): View more from California

I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.

(1-215): View more from Pennsylvania

welcome to the club.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...

(860): View more from Connecticut

the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you

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(973): View more from New Jersey

Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?

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(703): View more from Virginia

It wasn't my fault.

(330): View more from Ohio

You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.

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