It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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