i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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