people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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