On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
