chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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