when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
