well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
