i always forget guys have bellybuttons
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
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