Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
