I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Randomize
