So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Acid is not a monday night drug
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
