Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
