I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
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