She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize