It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
this is an emotional support booty call
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
