do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
