Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
