p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
