It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Randomize
