I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
