This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize
