We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
honey bunches of taint.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
