my room smells like sperm. sweet.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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