she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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