People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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