i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
