I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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