Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry JadeNikole hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(646): View more from New York

I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.

Fav 26 9532 1651
share tweet
(330): View more from Ohio

did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..

Fav 35 1527 6115
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...

Fav 14 6015 1420
share tweet
(301): View more from Maryland

He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.

Fav 6 4703 1339
share tweet
(913): View more from Kansas

To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!

Fav 10 2159 844
share tweet
(281): View more from Texas

To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.

Fav 8 1125 747
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(704): View more from North Carolina

At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.

Fav 0 861 494
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(734): View more from Michigan

Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath

Fav 2 47 21
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(843): View more from South Carolina

It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.

Fav 0 135 6
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT