i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
