Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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