its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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