His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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