We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
