help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
