I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
How does it feel to date your dad?
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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