But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
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