I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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