To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
NoShamevember. You game?
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
