I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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