Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
